“I co-operate so that we all win. I am not in competition with anyone.”
Most of us grew up conditioned to believe that life is a competition. Competition is not limited only to your professional world, you may compete even with family over who is more loved, who takes better care of the house, who earns more, and so on.
- Your tendency to compete becomes your habit. You may lose awareness and may unknowingly live in fear, tension and anxiety all the time of being ahead of others.
- When you compete with someone, you are at loss. You may either fall short of utilising your potential and be happy about being ahead of the other person, or you may end up stretching yourself way beyond your capacity and get stressed. Your aim would be to be better than others, rather than being your best.
- Make cooperation your purpose of life, not competition. You are not against each other, you are with each other. You are not in a race, you are on this journey together. You will share what you know and take others along as you move forward. This shift will change the way you live and bring unprecedented success.
Let us listen and revise our affirmations
Competition – The Story
The father worked in a power plant. Therefore, the family shifted to a nearby colony and that’s when it all started. The colony was full of engineer fathers who believed that their sons also had to become top-notch engineers somehow.
So, as the son grew up, the mantra was to become an engineer and go overseas for a plum job. The son had to meet that expectation. With so much drilling and indoctrination, the son was competing against his classmates, his school alumni who had already done it, and his father’s expectations. Colossal stress already!
He got through his exams with decent marks. He sat for the competitive exams and he cleared them as well. Then, the placements happened. He was again competing, now all by himself. A top-notch offer couldn’t go to someone else! He finally got an offer and the job commenced. Once again, he was competing because he couldn’t let the incentives and promotions go to anyone else.
Now competing was in his blood. He was doing it for himself. That fed him, kept him going, or he thought so.
What did others see? A man who was fidgety, never at peace, never smiling, always stressed, and fearful of others’ success. He was ‘wanting’ all the while.
His wife asked him one day. Why was he competing like that and where would it lead him?
Competition may lead you to an abyss of no return.
At the office, at home, with family members, with your spouse, with your own children, even something small like a better seat in an aircraft, one can be so self-centred. That can easily lead you down a dark hole of no return. It becomes a habit. You will live constantly in stress and fear.
Just be the best at what you can do.
The man in the story is good. His spouse now advises him to just be the best at what he does. She suggests he should feel happy that he has done his best and then walk away. There is no need to look at what others are doing. Do everything for the love of doing things. Not for the fruit of winning over others. The wind will be there, but it cannot bother you so much.
Cooperation should be a goal, not competition.
Try to work with others. Help them too. Rather, make others win. Co-operate with them. Feel good that you can make others win. Live for others too. Sharing is good.
The qualities of happiness and contentment are achieved through sharing of successes with others. Remind yourself that your peace is your original quality and when you come back to it through cooperation, it is the happiest part of your life.
The man, ably supported by his wife, is trying to change. He’s taken up a sport. He tried competing there too. His wife has asked him to simply enjoy the game though. It’s fine if others win!
There is beauty even in the smallest of things, if only you look closely.
Let us revise our affirmations-
I am a happy being.
I am contented with who I am.
I set goals of self change, goals to achieve.
My happiness and contentment are my qualities independent of my goal.
I am happy when others achieve their goals.
There is no comparison, no competition.
We are in different journeys. Moving at our pace.
I cooperate with people by empowering them to move forward in their journey. Cooperation is natural to me.