How to Not Get Offended and Ditch your Ego

“Be grounded in self-worth. Take no offense to whatever people say about you.”

There are times when we feel offended at little scenes of life. Either we are unhappy with our own self, we cannot accept a situation, or we are upset that people are not meeting our expectations.

  1. Frequently feeling offended makes it your habit. Your happiness gets blocked, your health gets affected, your relationships suffer and deplete your energy field. Irritation soon becomes your way of life.
  2. Practice daily meditation and spiritual study to have the constant awareness of your original qualities of peace, love and happiness.
  3. Accept people for who they are. Their behaviours will not always match with your definition of right and wrong. You cannot afford to get disturbed each time they are different.
  4. Play your role according to your values and capacity and let people be according to theirs. Share what you feel is right but don’t expect them to be the same. Don’t judge, criticize or argue to prove yourself right.
  5. Even if people do something which is not right for you creating emotional disturbance is your choice. You also have a choice to remain peaceful and radiate love to them.

The singer had just been through a huge popularity wave. Over six years, whatever song she sang went on to become a classy hit. She got called for shows across the world and sponsors called for her voice for their jingles. It was quite satisfactory for her.

Then, a music director happened to dub a song with her voice but felt that it wasn’t suiting his purpose well, paid her but retained voice of someone else who had originally sung the song before the singer had dubbed for it.

The singer took offence. The music director tried to reason with her saying that he was obligated to the story and the character in the film. So, he had to retain the earlier voice. But the singer had a tantrum and the industry came to know she wasn’t cooperating.

And producers who were eager to give her work, stepped back. Music directors kept quiet when her managers called. She took more offence at their attitude. She made nasty comments on Twitter. It made matters worse.

Her popularity had taken a dive. She wasn’t getting work anymore. An old mentor came by and saw her plight. He took charge. He taught how to be resilient in such circumstances.

Deal with facts and do not search for meanings behind facts to take offence.

He taught her how to be a professional and not take offence because of something that happens outside of her control. He requested her to not take offence but reconcile with the facts as they are.

She was advised to meditate and make peace in her own mind, that would also help in her Riyaz setting a clear focus on singing and connect with her own talent.

Engage positively with people and things that are present in your sphere of influence.

She was advised to focus her time and energy only on the things she could change, and not waste them over things she cannot influence. She was asked not to engage in gossip, criticism or judgments.

Accept people and situations and know everything will not go the way you wish for it to go.

She was advised to accept people and situations for who or what they are. She had to work her way through those challenges and limitations, because life presents adversity many a time. Acceptance would bring a lot of peace.

She had to remind herself that she was talented and talent always has a place, and she wasn’t to yield that place to negativity. She had to focus, envision her success and execute a plan without much ado.

She did. The very next year had two of her songs hitting the charts. The months in wilderness was immediately forgotten by all music directors and she was their numero uno choice again!


Let’s revise our affirmation to be calm and relaxed in every situation

I am a powerful being.
I am calm and easy in every scene.
I know who I am. What I need. What I am capable of.
I live by my values.
I radiate my highest energy in every scene.
I have beautiful relationships.
I understand we are all different.
Sometimes people do not agree with me.
Sometimes they may say or do something that doesn’t align with my values.
I withdraw from arguments or conflict.
My behaviour is untouched by their behaviour.
I am dignified always.

Apurva Popat

Apurva Popat

Dr Apurva Popat has been teaching Medical science since he was in his medical school and has helped many students to master medical and spiritual knowledge.

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